Topic: Staring

Often, those who look out of the ordinary are the objects of intrusive staring. Facial disfigurement caused by any reason can be a barrier to communication, complicate social interaction, and cause isolation and rejection. Contending with staring is one of the most frequently reported concerns of burn patients and families.

In this interactive session, we’ll explore questions such as, “How does it feel to be the object of a stare?”; “What do you do when you encounter someone with a physical difference?” We’ll discuss the emotions experienced by both the person staring and the individual who is the object of a stare, and learn social and communication skills that can reduce anxiety related to appearance, stares and social interactions. We’ll see how our “response,” not “reaction” to a stare often determines the outcome of an experience. Rarely are stares intended to be hurtful, yet most of the time, stares are perceived to be malicious.

Charlene Pell, Burn Survivor

For more than 20 years, Charlene has lectured and conducted workshops at conferences and retreats, nationwide and in Canada, to educate individuals, loved ones and healthcare professionals about why we all stare, and to teach techniques to facilitate communication and ease social interactions. She has published and presented articles, abstracts, and a documentary about issues related to living with a visible difference. She is the founder of Facing Forward, a national 501©3 nonprofit organization that provides information, services, emotional support and educational programs to help individuals with facial or physical differences contend with staring and communicate with confidence and courage.

She also educates middle school students without a visible difference about the issues and challenges of living with a visible difference through a program that she created, Outside, Inside: You Decide. The interactive program encourages students to explore and discuss their feelings, attitudes, perceptions and beliefs about differences.

Charlene and her former fiancé were severely burned in a catastrophic, private airplane crash in March 1994. She sustained severe burns to 64% of her body, including her face. Her fiancé died 21 days later. She made a triumphant recovery from her extensive, life-altering injuries, seven-month hospitalization, 49 operations and five-and-a-half years of physical and occupational rehabilitation.